I know your strong, PLEASE.... who cares when I have the higher SATS?

The dawning of a new week is upon us. It shall be a better week, a quieter week, a less cranky week, and most of all THE WEEK BEFORE EXAMS.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH……………is the sound my anxiety makes. Well, there’s always next week. So Haley, someone very special I know had a birthday. In other news, that person’s cell phone was not on during the hours of their birthday. However, I will not fault them since I love them dearly and do not know how my life could go on without them in it. In other news, a mysterious package may be arriving at someone’s house. Fascinating how those two unrelated topics somehow are connected in my mind. It’s not like I was even thinking about the mysterious birthday elves I sent out to do my shopping for me as I typed that last sentence.


Since the elves were brought up randomly, I’ll inform you of some of the exciting news they had to report. This of course means more forms to fill out for Elfish employment. (There’s a form to employ every magical creature these days; absolutely ludicrous if you ask me.) However, I feel that filling out the elfish entitlement to story rights is worth it to bring you this charming piece of information written by an elf named Dexter. I feel the need to annotate certain parts of the story, sorry in advance.

Once upon a time, (Elves are so clichéd)
I was sent to the mall to go shopping for a client. They demanded (so not true, I asked firmly yet kindly) that I find the perfect gift for their friends’ birthday. As I often do, I suggested a home made gift because they are just the best kind. (Or, because I am an inherently lazy elf who would get paid fully to watch someone make a gift) The client refused and thus I ended up at the local mall. As I walked around trying to gather my bearings in a mall so large, I happened upon a bookstore. Now, I knew the client’s friend was extremely bookish. Perhaps she was described as a little nerdy, seldom normal, and often perplexing, but my client seemed to think these traits were all “awesome.” As I looked up and saw the two story building looming over me, I knew I had found my store. Now, I just needed to find a gift. My quest took me up the escalator to the comic book, anime, and adult fantasy aisle. (Don’t ask me why these books are all in one section- it’s an odd combination.) There, I happened on a Fraggle Rock book. I opened out of curiosity. The cover was just o’so charming and I could not resist. As soon as I had plopped down on the floor to read the book, a strange yet mysterious man appeared from behind the book shelf. He began to lecture me on the importance of substance abuse in modern culture. When the man finally took a breath, I took the opportunity to ask a question:
"JUST WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE PAL?"
The man was not fazed, or as I later found out not a man at all. He was a genii, tied to the openings and closings of the Fraggle Rock book. He was destined to remain in that book cover until the end of eternity unless someone bought the book and freed him. Well, I was so overwhelmed that I just fainted dead on the spot. (Because he is a pansy…) Immediately after coming to, I raced back to my client’s (without a gift I might add) and filed this report. I am immediately requesting transference to Santaland and away from the gift service of joy.
Signed and Dated by Dexter of the Mid-land Elvish Clan


Dear other readers of this blog. You will probably find this entire story rather perplexing. You should, it means you’re a normal person. Even so, you should be made aware of one thing: Fraggle Rock. It is a show of beauty and love and Muppets…and….and….AND AWESOME!

That's right, keep it weird kids!

Pictures of my beastly pet rock will hopefully be released within the near future. Apparently, there is a problem with my memory card that is being resolved. Terribly sorry about that minor issue. In the true spirit of the dorks we are, the show MUST GO ON despite the lack of tattooed rocks featured on this blog. Now, to present THIS WEEKS CHALLENGE:


Cultural Immersion will take place in a way you have never thought of before.


YouTube for the Uncultured

Yes, Haley that's right. While you are a bonified nerd in so many areas you desperately lack the ability to be endlessly entertained by the audio visual nerdiness of others. I really appreciate your take on N.E.R.D.G.Y.M. I agree, that system should be imposed in every school system around the country. The shenanigans of gym could be so easily avoided that way! Sadly, there is one problem with your plan. There are not enough nerds in one school to fund this program. If you feel your life lacks the proper nerdy tinge that is so necessary, you should travel to a place where nerds run rampant and free. I am talking about the Internet. Yes, I am aware that the Internet is also used to stream videos of Sarah Palin, butt sex, and other such disturbing things.

Like the Closet Optimist I occasionally am, the Internet restores my faith in humanity because.....
1.There are a multitude of nerds online. Isn't it better to be nerdy online together via blog or YouTuber or deviant art or fanfiction.net than be nerdy in your room by yourself? Nerding is not something easily done alone. (Oh yeah, it's a verb now.)

2. The Internet is sometimes used for things besides pictures of cute kittens and streaming videos of the idiotic politicians in our country. Shockingly, the Internet is often used to promote good, share ideas that would better our country, or even promote charities.

3. Most importantly, the Internet is important because it allows for things like N.E.R.D.G.Y.M to become a reality to me and thousands of like minded people around the world.

Bask in the glow of this video Hayley. It is one of my favorites in the entire world that is YouTube. It was created by the Vogbrothers for one of their punishment videos. I hope this video entices you to become fans of the Vlogbrothers as they are probably my favorite YouTubers EVER!

This video calls out to my inner geek.

Since it is your birthday week and I believe you may have exams, I wanted to ease you into my challenges. Don't worry they'll get progressively harder.

I extra, especially enjoyed your last post with the gorgeous pictures. Your right, the fashiony necklace was fabulous. Nevertheless, even more fabulous were your literary pajamas.

Have a wonderful week my dear.

Rhea

N.E.R.D.G.Y.M. And Cool Stuff From Places

Hi Rhea it's Saturday, and I must say that I am extremely disappointed in your lack of Pet Rock pictures...but I will allow, as apparently The Universe is focusing all of its energy on making your life extra-horrible *rolls eyes*. So today I'm going to show off some of the awesome stuff I received from international sources (thank you, The Universe!) and discuss my idea for Physical Education for the intellectually inclined. But first, a few thoughts.

• So I've recently started (and almost finished) Fahrenheit 451. You actually probably read it in school, like, a long time ago, but for some reason I got skipped at some point in my middle-school career...but no matter. If you haven't read the book, its all about censorship and hedonism and ignorance, and its really thought provoking and all that good stuff, and I think that you would enjoy it. I just wanted to say that it got me thinking about how people really kind of need pain and fear and all of these things to fight for in order to be happy. Because the people in this book never have anything to worry about, they never even have to think about anything that could possibly be emotionally troubling...and most of them are miserable. Sure, they seem happy on the surface, but then the teenagers are killing each other left and right, and adults are committing suicide for apparently no reason at all, just because they have all these feelings and no way to express them, or they have no feelings at all and they feel empty and unfulfilled. So I think that although we have a tendency to wonder exactly why all of these bad things need to happen, the truth is that we're so perfectly equipped to handle it that we almost can't live without it. Our whole lives are about fighting; not winning.

• Um, also....you have my snowpants. So earlier today when I wanted to go outside and build a snow sculpture (which ended up being some kind of fish elephant dinosaur with whiskers), I had to wear my old, really tight, obnoxiously purple ones.

• I'm ashamed to say that I spent all day watching Adventure Time on Cartoon Network.

So now for my latest and greatest idea!

I call it...

Non-conventional

Exercise

Regiment

Designed for

Geeky

Young

Minds

....More commonly known as Nerd Gym (a happy coincidence). Nerd Gym, to be brief, is just like regular gym in that it helps to keep young people fit and healthy. It is different however, in the ways that it is done. Tell me, Rhea, nerds everywhere, have you ever wished that you could learn how to sword fight? How about do Martial arts like a ninja, or be schooled in the ways of the Jedi? Of course you have! You're a nerd! Well, this and more can be made possible with Nerd Gym. You see, Nerd Gym isn't any less strenuous or challenging than regular gym, just more interesting. If I could have chariot races and various swish-and-flicking Harry Potter wizard exercises in gym class, then I would be properly motivated, and therefore perform better. that's right nerds, no more stain on your otherwise flawless report card! Not to say that all nerds are bad at sports, of course. But I certainly am. So I'd just like to give you one more challenge this week, as you are much more artistic than I am. Do you think that you could whip up a N.E.R.D.G.Y.M. logo for me? Pleeeeese? i know you wouldn't be able to put it up right way, but eventually? Thanks (assuming you said yes, of course. If you said no, then CURSE YOU!).

Now, cool stuff from places!!!!

Now, the first cool stuff from places is this antique necklace my dad brought back from the United Arab Emirates. I thought you might appreciate it, being all fashion-y and whatnot.

Now, for the more important things! These are my incredibly awesome birthday presents from my wonderful adopted Finnish family!

Okay, so I think that this one warrants some explaining. You see, where Americans have Micky Mouse...the Finns have Moomin. Just to clarify, Moomin is this cute little Hippo thing with a cast of interesting creature and human friends. This thing of awesome is a night gown with one of the human Moomin characters on it. It reads, "Hip Hip Hip Hip Hip Hip Hip". Now as to what that means, I have no idea, but it's adorable nonetheless. Also, it's sideways. But that's just because I'm too lazy to fix it. And although I'm not wearing it in this picture, I AM wearing it right now as I type this, along with my "So many books, so little bedtime" pajama pants. I am invincible.

This one is more straightforward, but equally incredible. Hello Kitty merchandise. Who couldn't use more of that? Not really Finnish, strictly speaking, but not everything from Finland must be Finnish. I have reasonable evidence that the Japanese population are quite taken with Moomin mania these days.

Also sideways.

Thank you Universe.

IS THIS THING ON!!?

Yes Haley, I have promised to update daily. So I have. However, I have miserably failed at one part of this blog. I cannot, for the life of me figure out how to work my camera. Yes, there are pictures of my rock on it. Yes the rock is adorable, and yes the flash drive is in my computer. Sooooo why aren't the pictures downloading? Hmmm maybe it has to do with the conspiracy to absolutely destroy my life's ambitions thats going on right now?

CURSE YOU UNIVERSE- THOU HAS SMITED ME TIME AND TIME AGAIN. THOSE WRETCHED IDEALS TO WHICH I HOLD SO TRUE HAVE BEEN VENOMOUSLY DESTROYED IN THE GREAT TIME OF SUFFERING.

This picture says what I cannot. I am completely and utterly bewildered at the disaster that is my life right now. Picture Rhea and real Rhea are both overwhelmed and not very bemused. More scared. Yes, definitely more scared for life than bemused.

The universe doesn't even want my pet rock project to be successful. Unfortunately, you may have to wait for a few more days until you can see my pet rock, but I will give you a brief one word preview. Think tattoos.


It's my challenge week next week, and I already have one prepared.

Until tomorrow Haley,

I bid you adieu.

Meet Felix!!!

Hi Rhea it's Wednesday, and guess what? SNOWDAY!!!! Haha.


You know, I probably shouldn't rub it in your face that you had to go to school today (I think...) and I got to watch Spirited Away and take awesome winter photos, especially after turning my phone off for two strait weeks and not blogging for one and a half.


But oh well.

Look at the pretty pictures!

So yeah, it's pretty much a winter wonderland here. In other, more exciting news, I finally had time to make my pet rock!


Name: Felix (meaning lucky; also the name of the 1960's meteorite thought to be his father.)
Occupation: Spy from unknown alien world (no one knows why he has an Irish name). Taken from his home planet at a young age, he was raised to be and inter-galactic government agent. He is a master of disguise. He landed on Earth when he lost control of his space pod on the way to an important mission and was sucked into a wormhole.
Hobbies: Being awesome, reading thought provoking novels by the fireplace, cruising the galaxy in his space pod, putting dangerous alien anarchist organizations (non-organizations?) in their place, and playing lead synthesizer in his popular techno band.
Personality: Felix is quiet and contemplative, and good at keeping a cool head in critical situations. He is a natural-cemented scientist and mathematician, with strong interest in philosophy and the arts. His excellent problem-solving skills often come in handy in his risky line of work. Despite these many strengths, however, Felix does tend to have trouble in social situations, such as parties. He has yet to find a nice lady rock to fight crime with.

I hope to post tomorrow night as well, and look forward to you pet rock pics! I might not be able to on Friday though (Les Mis reunion!). I do hope that the elves will spare me (and then we can further discuss this Orlando Bloom obsession of yours...)

'Till tomorrow,
Haley

In Which, The Wrath of Orlanda Shall be Felt

Someone Needs to start blogging again and stop ignoring my phone calls.
That is all.

But... if you fail to heed this message, I already have several punishments in mind.

The punishment elves are hard at work right now thinking of ways to torture you.

Interesting how the punishment elves all look exactly like Legolas from Lord of the Rings. Maybe I want to get punished too....

You're suprisingly cavilier about this blogging business.

Now, that is all

Maybe We Should Talk....

Wow Haley! We've only just begun our project and already we've missed a day. Hmmm....what to do what to do? Is a punishment in order? Anyhow, despite the fact I'm super tired and I only got two hours of sleep last night (I kid you not, TWO!) I am blogging.

A pet rock project! Yes, I am very excited about this challenge. I already have my rock picked out and named. So here is a quick introduction to my rock:




Name: Charles (Chuck for short)
Age: Super old, he's a rock duh?!
Hobbies: Sleeping, breaking windows, taking long romantic walks on the beach, going swimming
Sexual Preference: Unknown as he is a rock
Favorite Color: Stone Grey
Favorite Animal: Snails
Pet: Charles has a pet lady bug, he currently seems to have gone MIA

Pictures shall appear soon!
Rhea and Chuck

A Chia Abraham Lincoln

Hey, Re! So I just decided that I'd probably better blog so as to not crush your spirit. I know how fragile you can be. Also, I AM a bit late already...but cut me some slack. It's been crazy here. I've only been back at school for two days, my room is in complete, crime scene-Esq disarray, Kinnicky has apparently chosen my bathtub as the most suitable hiding place for his dismembered plastic mouse toy parts (I'm so proud!), and one of my Christmas presents has directions which suggest that the mysterious device (called a "Fushigi") could possibly cause some kind of rip in the space-time continuum. Also, homework. So. Much. Homework. But all excuses aside, I thought that we should be getting to our first challenge. So, I am pleased to present to you....

The pet rock project!!!!

Yay!!!

Ah, yes. Classic yet wonderful. The pet rock. The goal of the Pet Rock project is to make an original Pet Rock with a unique personality, and to care for it for at least a week, posting updates on your rock's progress. Here are the steps:

1. Get a rock. (If you are having trouble finding a rock, as they tend to hibernate this time of year, you may use a more common substance.)

2. Name your rock and give them a personality, complete with exciting back story.

3. Decorate your rock (optional).

4. Create a living space for your rock (optional,l if you want your rock to have no place to sleep at night).

5. Go on many rock-themed adventures!

So with that, I bid you good night. I look forward to your pet rock.